We all to often play the "if onlys", instead of having boundaries. We say unconsciously, "if only I would continue to try harder instead of confronting someone's perfectionistic demands, they will like or love me. If only I would give into their wishes and not make them angry.. giving up boundaries to get love postpones the inevitable, the realization of the truth about the person, the embracing of the sadness of that truth, and letting go and moving on with life. Let go! Face what you will never have from this person, or who this person symbolizes. All of my attempts to preserve this relationship has taken a lot of energy, effort and opening myself up to a lot of abuse and control. Letting go is the way to serenity. Grief is the path. I have to step out in faith, allow God to lead the way. Onto change and growth. Never stop praying for peace and equality.